Category Archives: Bad Movies

StevenF Review of Outlawed

The British film Outlawed was released on October 2, 2018. The plot revolves around an ex-Special Forces officer (Adam Collins) who finds himself fighting against corruption and drugs in Nottingham, England. There is also a subplot of him protecting a girl (Jessica Norris) who he has known since childhood.

First, let me mention what I found good about the movie. There was plenty of gunfire, blood, and some guts. Collins, the main actor, in real life was a Marine, is a stuntman, and has a black belt in karate. That was very helpful in projecting his character, however he also helped write and direct the movie. The film had too many things going on for the first 20 minutes which were not connected very well and caused the story to drag. Jessica Norris was alright as was Ian Hitchens who was the villain.

Some people may have found the accent a bit incomprehensible; I know I did. Over all, this was not as good as I was hoping. I would not bother to watch this again due to the excessive sex scenes and overuse of foul language. I rate this 2 stars out of 5.

Remmy’s Review of What Still Remains

What Still Remains 14 August 2018, If any of you have watched The Walking Dead or seen or read Stephen King’s book The Stand, just combine the two and condense them and you have this run of the mill movie. On the other hand you may enjoy it more than I did.

There are two groups involved here, the bad Christian Cult, and the bad… well I don’t know what to call them. Both are trying to gain followers, and both murder and rape people. Par for the course.

I rate this movie a whopping 2 out of 5 stars and that is pushing the limit, but like I said – you may enjoy it.

Remmy’s Review of Corbin Nash

Corbin Nash, April 2018, If you love vampire movies you are sure to like this. The premise is that the original vampires were angels sent from heaven to inherit the earth. At that point they are demons. According to the movie that is exactly what happened. Not sure where the teeth came from.

There is no gore, but there is plenty of blood. Corbin Nash (played by Englishman Dean Jagger) our protagonist is a cop whose parents were murdered at a baseball game. Overall the movie is action packed if you can get over the vampires, and senselessness of it all. I didn’t even know the English played baseball.

The vampires really like street fighting, to tenderize the meat I presume. None of that is shown, so you cannibals are out of luck.

Corey Feldman, who I did not recognize at all, plays Queenie… a part I sure would not have played but I guess money is money to some people. I do have to give kudo’s here, he did it well.

There are a couple of other big name stars in it, you will have to figure which is tho (without looking it up on IMDB!)

Do my best to get over the stupidity of the infamous vampire genre I found it hard to give this movie 3 stars, but i did, just because you guys will rip my throat out and leave me to die if I don’t. 3 out of 5 stars. I will not watch this again nor will I buy the movie. But the title and graphics were cool!

Remmy’s Review of Gone are the Days

Gone are the Days. March 2018, Directed by Mark Gould, Featuring Lance Hendrickson, Tom Beringer, Danny Trejo, and Steve Railsback. They say this movie is understated but in my opinion they should have saved the film and cameras for something else. I really like westerns, but when I saw this western I was taken aback. Now I don’t need a lot of killing or gore to like a western, but I do not like an hour of watching a drunk taking heroin, and that is what I got out of this movie.

There were some good and cute scenes in it. The sheriff can hear every word two little boys and a girl is saying as they are planning on raiding his cabin/office for information. Another one is when the protagonist decides to burn down a tree and burns his whole farm down. Of course, booze and heroin can do that.

We are talking about a man that is about to die, and he has one last thing he has to do before dying. A sweet premise for a lousy movie. The acting was good, you will see some well-known faces in it. The kids were great, the old men were… Nah. I give this movie a one out of five, I do not want to see drunks for over an hour on a movie screen.

Remmy’s Review of Death House

Death House 23 February 2018, As you tumble through life, you believe that the government is always on your side. Conspiracy theorists believe the government is out to get you one way or the other. Of course, you have good and evil, and some believe the evil is just a part of human nature. and there is no free will. Odd because a person can decide not to kill and eat an eight-year-old, but they will do it anyway,

The photography of this film reminds me of the WWII Marine films of the time, except in color. Badly photographed, Very disjointed, Lack of proper editing, almost as if it were a US Government propaganda film. A film like this would really throw the average American off track, of course, it is not real, but then again if the Government was behind it, it would be very real

There will be a few underpaid actors in the film you will remember from other films, but none were good enough to get a great salary. Another Government way to do things. In 1993 Chris Carter got a bunch of backing for the Roswell incident and called it the X-Files. Years of work and even though the agents came across the explainable countless times, well there was no evidence. The men in black syndrome.

Do *I* believe in conspiracy theories? Not really. On the other hand, there are so many out there, like stars in the sky, that some of them have to be true. After all, we all know we are not alone in the galaxy, at least that is what people tell me,

This trash film will give you an idea of what our government, like all governments, are doing. Do I believe it? No, but I think it is possible. If you like crude military films with lots of blood and gore, you will love this. I rate it 2 out of 5 stars.

Remmy’s Review of: Mute

Mute (February 2018) TV-MA, Alexander Skarsgard (Leo), Paul Rudd (Cactus Bill), with a cast like this you would think this would be a stellar movie, not only because it has science fiction sections it it, however this movie falls flat on its face. A German Amish mute takes on the gangsters in Germany but during his quest to find his love, we have to deal with child molesting doctor, mild gangsters and the final ten minutes. I have to say  Violence, some blood, and one semi gore scene. I never experienced a two hour show where I wished I didn’t turn it on. Others have given this a good review, but sorry I cannot do that. 2 stars out of 5, and I am sure others will agree with me, this movie missed the mark.

StevenF Review of Bitch

Bitch was released on November 10, 2017 as a made-for-TV movie. It is a dark comedy about a woman whose life comes crumbling down due to her philandering husband and four demanding children. Due to all of the pressures of her family, she has a nervous breakdown and takes on the personality of a vicious dog. The rest of the film shows how this effects her husband and children.

This has a few physical humorous scenes, but for the most part it falls flat. Jason Ritter (son of late actor John Ritter) plays Bill Hart, a man who thinks that the women in his life are there for his own selfish needs. Marianna Palka (she also wrote and produced the film) plays Jill, a woman who is slowly sinking into mental oblivion. Since this is an usual story line, its difficult for me to say how believable the characters are. The child actors were good as well as the actress who played the sister-in-law. I wasn’t too crazy about the sound track which seemed to consists of experimental jazz.

I did watch this movie all the way through although at the point where the husband is left with the kids, I lost interest. The ending was, like the movie, up in the air. I don’t really plan to watch this again. Its like seeing something at a bakery that looks appetizing, but when you try it, you are sorely disappointed. Since there was some foul language, an irritating sound track and a disappointing story line, I can only give this 2 stars out of 5.

Paul’s review of Deadly Detention

Deadly Detention is a comedy?, mystery, horror movie released on 17th September 2017 and follows five high school students who are serving their detention at a former detention centre as the school is being overrun by possums. The five teens are not your usual bad students as they include a sporty goody two shoes, a bible loving Christian and a quiet skateboarder. Out of the group there only seems to be one trouble maker who is constantly fighting with the principal.

They are dropped off on the school bus driven by the hall security guard who escorts them to a holding room where they are instructed to complete an assignment by the principal. After a phone call, the principal suddenly leaves the room and what follows can only be described as a poor attempt to scare. Even though the directing is good, and the musical score does a lot to cause anxiety, the acting is so poor I was cringing throughout. The sporty teen is dressed as though she is about to run a marathon and the skater simply does not know how to skate. It really is typecasting at an all-time low. Even the ending was messed up!

I really need to stop picking weekend movies as I make lousy choices, but this must be a new low. I would not recommend this – 1.5 from 5 from me.

StevenF Review of What Happened to Monday?

The dystopian multi-national produced film, What Happened to Monday? was released in the US on August 18, 2017. It revolves around the concept that Earth’s population is growing dangerously and a solution must be found. A scientist (Glenn Close) comes up with a universal one-child only proposition. Siblings are to be frozen until the Earth can support their numbers. At least that is what everyone thinks.

Noomi Rapace plays all seven sisters who are hidden and educated by their grandfather (Willem Dafoe). Ms. Rapace more than met the challenge of coming up with seven different characters who are pretending to be one woman. I cannot say that the acting was excellent, but the actors were believable. Willem Dafoe, an actor I like, spent maybe fifteen minutes total screen time. I felt that he could have had more screen time. The story line had action and suspense but other than that, it had gaps of logic. The story line was an expansion on China’s One Child Policy and a rather weak expansion at that.

Over all, I must say that I am disappointed in this movie. I don’t know whether it was the influence of the 6 or 7 production companies involved in the making of this film or the writing, but I would not buy this for my collection. If dystopian futures are your thing, then you may enjoy this film. As I stated earlier, the actors are great but the story line was a bit weak. I give this 2 1/2 stars out of 5.

Remmy’s Review of the Wrong Babysitter

The Wrong Babysitter 22 April 2017. I felt this was a mundane movie, even if it had some ‘good’ actors/tresses in it. The problem is they did not act. Although there was some suspense as they zero in the killers, it wasn’t edged of your seat. This deserved a PG 13 rating and wasted film.

I have nothing good to say about this movie

Come on Hollywood you can do much better than this slosh. 2 out of 5 from me.